Women must be encouraged to show strong objection

Female community: `Mathata Thitha' has several meanings because it puts a full stop not only to drugs and alcohol but to many other misdeeds such as beating wife, abusing daughters/sisters, harassing women, father/grandfather raping daughters/granddaughters.

It is the Sri Lankan female community which receives most of the benefits from `Mathata Thitha' and it is them who should actively promote it starting from their homes without any hesitation.

Women suffer at the hands of drunken husbands and other male family members. Women are subjected to passive smoking and suffer with their unborn children. Therefore they should be the people who come forward and promote `Mathata Thitha' and protest against drugs and alcohol.

But unfortunately so far the Sri Lankan female community has not demonstrated a significant objection towards drugs and alcohol at the bottom level (home) apart from taking part in few protests organised by some NGOs once in a while. They have not shown any objection at all so far towards becoming victims of passive smoking.

The time has come to show your strong objection against drugs and alcohol to the male family members. It is totally understandable that women who extend their support to financially depend on their husbands, fathers and brothers cannot directly object but there are certain ways even such women can promote `Mathata Thitha'. Any woman can demand for fresh air if subjected to passive smoking at any place.

Better to act (forcibly opening shutters) rather than shouting because then you can prevent men from saying get a car and travel if you don't like smoke!

Women who are financially independent can openly show their strong objection. They can make a complaint to the nearest police station (better if they can go to a police station where a Childrens' and Women's Desk is available) if there is abuse going on and they can seek the help of Women's Complain Centres operated countrywide under the purview of Child Development and Women's Empowerment Ministry.

Assistance can be obtained from certain organisations such as women In Need. The challenge is not so big for financially independent, educated and professional women.

But it is sad to see even professional women suffer in silence for decades. According to one telephone call received by me some time back, such a woman wanted to know the address and the contact number of the nearest complaints centre. She was being abused for over 30 years.

This type of tolerance is not a bravery or showing off strength. Escape from abuse and torture is not a crime but a right. Most of the women victims say that they tolerate their drunken or drug addict husbands because of their children.

This is totally meaningless and false argument because a mother who is in an unhappy and uncomfortable status will never be able to do any good to her children apart from releasing her anger and frustration on them.

There are several instances that husbands take hard-earned money from their wives and buy drugs and alcohol. This is a very common practice in low income families. NGOs, social service officers, child right protection officers and samurdhi animators, have a major role to play in this situation. Sri Lankan NGOs can earn their lost reputation by intervening and rescuing such wives and children.

This is one way that women who are financially dependent on their male partners/family members can get help.

They can ask different NGO representatives to visit their home to assist them to liberate them (Not divorce) from the grip of their drug and alcohol addict husbands. There are several other options that can be used.

Pretending that you fast unto death and running away from home for once or twice (but you have to make sure that you are safe outside home) are two of them. Wives can tell their husbands that they want to share booze. No alcohol addict husband will agree to this. He will definitely practise Mathata Thitha.