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| Thursday, 29 August 2002 |
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Baring all..! "Why didn't Sourav Ganguly, the Indian cricket captain take off his shirt and wave it at the crowd this time?" I asked a radio commentator, as we sat at Headingley, after the historic win by India over England. "Too many problems cropped up," said the commentator, "after the last shirt episode at Lords." "You mean the management chastised him?" I asked. "No the management had nothing against his behaviour, "said the commentator. "They are baring themselves so often to the cricketing world and showing off their true colours that they have no problem with the Indian captain doing the same." "So who caused the problem?" I asked a trifle irritably. "Junk mail," "Junk mail?" I asked puzzled. "Junk mail caused problems for the Indian captain after he removed his shirt last time?" . The commentator shook his head sadly. "Sourav got so much junk mail that he had to nearly abandon his computer at Lords, or pay for extra baggage." "Are you sure it wasn't fan mail?" I asked. "That's what Ganguly also thought it was when he opened his e-mail after the semi nude encounter," said the commentator, "he thought that all his fans had sent him mail praising him for his muscular physique, or that women were swooning over him and men admiring his manly chest.." "Ganguly doesn't have much of a manly chest," I said. "Try telling that to Ganguly," said the commentator. "His wife tried to tell him this when he first revealed his plans of taking off his shirt at Lords. She told him, 'Souravjee I love your chest, but others might not'. But did Ganguly listen? Do any of us listen to our wives?" "So what happened?" I asked impatiently. "Junk mail," whispered the commentator. "Threat mail or junk mail?" I asked. "No threat mail," said the commenetator. "Nobody felt threatened by Sourav's chest. In fact it gave many men around the world a superiority complex after their wives saw Ganguly semi clad. But the junk mail did him in" " Was it mail from company's who wanted him to model for them?" I asked. "Yes, there was a mail order company that manufactures a device like the Bullworker who wanted him to be there 'before' model. You know the man with the weak chest, before he uses the device? But that was only one. All the rest were junk" "What type of junk mail?" I asked. " Where they offering him something?" "Deodorants!" whispered the commentator. "Deodorants for test matches, for one dayers, for net practises. He was flooded by thousands of deodorant companies selling him their products, offering it to him free and some even asking him to be their brand ambassadors, willing to pay him millions if he sprayed it on himself before taking off his shirt" "Wonderful" I said. "So what prevented Ganguly from advertising for them?" "The International Board smelt a rat," said the commentator. "They felt it was another way of the Indian captain picking up unofficial endorsements. They told him they would take his pants off, if he took his shirt off again!" "Am I glad Ganguly didn't take off his shirt," I said to the commentator, who shook his head in silent agreement. |
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