A DAUGHTER’S GIFT…

Often, we hear of sacrifices made by parents towards their children. But we do not often hear of children reciprocating. In the case of Kelly Sia and her mother Mindy Lim, the story is one that warms the heart. As the world celebrated Mother’s Day, Kelly donated a kidney to her mother, not only as a way of thanking her but also as a lifeline that would keep her mother alive.

Mindy almost died from kidney complications a few years ago. She swelled up and could not move. Her heart stopped twice before being shocked into beating by doctors at the hospital. Her kidneys had been damaged as a result of untreated high blood pressure – she didn’t even know she had it.

Dialysis treatment

Despite everything that may be wrong with today’s generation, there are somethings that are right. There are some children who are polite, sensitive and care for other people – not every child lives in an oasis of selfishness and dismissal. Kelly personifies the caring youngster of today who chose to do something exceedingly precious for her ailing mother. When confronted with the seriousness of the illness – it was dialysis followed by a replaced kidney – Mindy realized she had to make a choice. Her daughter wanted to donate a kidney right away but had to wait until she was at least 18.

A single mother who had to work hard to support herself and her daughter, Mindy was finding herself limited in her daily routine with the dialysis treatment.

Mindy Lam, (Left) and her daughter, Kelly Sia, wait at the University of Maryland Medical Centre in Baltimore before Sia donated a kidney to Lam on February 15.

A daughter’s gift of life speaks volumes in a world marked by the single mindedness of youngsters bent on doing things for themselves - whether buying phones, iPods or the latest gadgets. Kelly represents a generation of young men and women who can truly be the exemplary child we all want to admire.

“It was heartbreaking to see my mom, who had worked so hard to support me, suffering all of the time," Kelly says,"One day, I started crying uncontrollably, thinking about how she was missing out on life - she was too sick to go to Hong Kong and visit her parents, couldn’t work, and spent most of her time lying in bed. Sometimes, she’d start screaming and vomiting, then black out.”

Both mother and daughter have scars near their belly buttons which they feel are some sort of a badge of honour they share, a mother-daughter thing so precious to them both. “It’s more precious than a tattoo and symbolizes the rebirth of my mom.” Says Kelly.

Child-parent relationships

When children give a part of themselves, whether physically or otherwise, their time or their attention, it can turn out to be something very cherished. Not all children can or will donate an organ to a parent but there are other things that they give. The world becomes a blessed place when children do pay attention to their parents and their needs.

It is up to the adults to involve and encourage children to play a role in giving and sharing. Children often follow by example. When they watch the adults play a role in giving things away – their time, their effort, their commitment, their possessions and their attention, the children want to follow.

Like Mindy and Kelly, there are many child-parent relationships that go beyond the average, on-the-surface format. In Sri Lanka too, many have chosen to donate a kidney sometimes to unrelated strangers out of a commitment to a better way of life. But when the gesture comes from a child to a parent, it is not only touching but important because it means that humanity still is intact. We can still hope and have faith in the good of humanity.