'Jetiquette' : Travel broadens the mind but shortens the temper

Gaston de Rosayro

Let us talk about flying etiquette or 'jetiquette' as I have coined it. Whoever said 'travel broadens the mind' forgot to add the critical amendment to the adage that it shortens the temper as well. Yes, travel has been described as a conflict of cultures but possibly more correctly it could simply be a clash of stereotypes.

Long gone are the days when air travel was an exciting and elegant experience. Many passengers are convinced that courtesy, at the airports or on the planes, is becoming about as rare as a free, hot in-flight meal on US domestic flights. They grouse that inconsiderate, or downright rude, behaviour is more common and that it is spurred by an increasing discomfort with all aspects of flying, from security rules to bare-bones service that put travellers on edge.

And the behaviour is unlikely to get better, because irritants such as extra airline fees and more crowded planes aren't going away soon. Which goes to make the flying experience a terrible gauntlet to run. And in the airlines' dash to cut down on expenses you are getting less legroom. Also people are fighting over luggage space such as the capacity crunch in overhead bins.

Frustration in the air

A person fallen asleep in an airplane

The cabin crew

Airlines are doing things that are making it more difficult and uncomfortable for the passenger, and the customer service is not getting that much better either. You compound those factors, and you have a lot of frustration in the air. And that frustration can lead to bad manners.

Flying used to be an adventure. Now it is an endurance contest. Passengers may be quietly rebelling - in a passive aggressive way - to show the airlines exactly how they feel about those long security lines, overbooked flights, lost luggage and interminable waits on the tarmac.

Perhaps we at times mistake different cultural values as discourteous or plain rudeness? Or are there simply international standards of common decency that travellers are failing to live up to? And are our skies really congested with so many rude and insolent people? The answer lamentably seems to be a resonant yes.

I hate air travel. Coming from one who has been a frequent flier and has journeyed through a good part of the world it might sound surprising. Air travel is annoying enough as it is because it can be expensive, stressful, scary, and, of course, cramped.

Which reminds me that the new generation of passenger jets such as the Airbus A380 and Boeing's new 787 Dreamliner may be kinder to the environment in terms of fuel efficiency and quieter than previous aircraft, but where's the benefit to economy-class passengers if you've still got the same insufficient leg room and seat pitch as you always had on a Jumbo? Besides, the claustrophobic feeling can reach new heights when you find yourself surrounded by obnoxious or inconsiderate fellow travellers and inattentive or hostile in-flight attendants.

Noisy co-passengers

Commercial airline travel takes us far, far out of our comfort zone. We are herded into cylinders that zip hundreds of miles per hour at 30,000 feet, subjected to security screenings, confronted with delays and lost luggage, rushed to catch connecting flights, constrained to small seats, scrunched up with strangers, and surrounded by all sorts of virus plagued seatmates. Is it any wonder we end up becoming a bundle of raw nerves by journey's end? We have all seen them: The people who clog the aisle while boarding an airplane.

Why, oh why, do not they just sit down so the plane can take off on time? Then there are the ones with poor hygiene, constantly coughing and sneezing. There are the loud talkers and seat-kickers. And there are the bin-hoggers with too much carry-on baggage. From picking their nose to clipping their toenails, some people are a crude, boorish lot in the air. And it gets worse.

Noisy co-passengers during a flight is the number one pet peeve for most travellers. But there are other habits that are as aggravating such as their falling asleep and snoring loudly into your ear. Worse still in this context are the people who actually fall asleep on you. There have been huge problems created by seat mates who fall asleep on you and drool.

There are also the drunks and people who it seems have not taken a shower in years. It is a good habit to bathe before a flight and use some self-preservative such as a deodorant for good measure. Remember that an airplane is an enclosed space with re-circulated air.

A terrible torture

So a stinkpot with foul body odour can make flying a terrible torture. It permeates the entire aircraft and just sets a bad tone for the entire flight. Believe it or not odour issues can get you kicked off a flight. Drinking too much alcohol on a plane too has led to plenty of unruly passenger incidents including fliers who mistook aisles and gate areas for restrooms. There have actually been passengers who attempted to bite cabin crew members. Do not be tempted to work off your own frustrations with such passengers by overindulging in alcohol. It may lead to an early landing and even a little jail time.

I am persistently shocked when considering how many people seem to pack their bags with utmost care and neatness while leaving their etiquette at home. Civility while travelling in any mode of transport is one of the secrets of a great and stress free journey.

Travelling can be a fun experience and as you bond with other travellers you might find that you make friends for life! Unfortunately you are not going to like everyone you meet and may bump into some really exasperating travellers. Annoying travel partners and fellow travellers can actually transform a pleasurable trip into a miserable, nerve-racking nightmare.

We do not have to tell you planes are packed these days - and not all passengers are people you would pick for friends or to have a sociable conversation with.

As the world becomes smaller and smaller with ease of access, the quality of reasonably decent people you meet on your sojourns seems to be gradually declining, while the number of infuriating travellers is on the rise. Research shows that some customers are occasionally frustrated by the behaviour of certain fellow passengers. Also they dare not confront them in fear of a hostile reaction.

I distinctly remember a big bragger when I was on a flight coming into Portland Airport, USA. He was dressed casually sitting beside me speaking really loudly on his cell phone: "Yeah, I think I am going to buy about three million dollars worth of that stock....And what's that... Oh yeah my porsche is in the shop. Gotta pick it up tomorrow." Then the darned liar's mobile phone rang. I have never seen a redder face.

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