Immoral yet immortal?

"You shall not commit adultery" (Exodus 20:14).

Men and women were designed to be together. Marriage is divinely ordained. It is the natural union of a man and woman. It is a bond established by God because he had authorized that marriage relationship is the foundation of family.

Yet how many partners stay faithful to each other today? The world had become topsy-turvy!

Our society frowns down on relationships which they have termed as 'immoral'. Homosexuality, lesbianism, incest and adultery is a crime in their eyes.

I do not intend to question such alliances. I leave it for the individuals to decide on which course to take. Peoples' private affairs do not offend me. It is a delicate subject which is still a taboo topic in our society.

My focus is on a new kind of trend. More and more men go for much older women and wise versa. Some may have experienced a lot in life and are looking for a difference, but is the answer striking a relationship with an older woman?

The unions of older women and younger men are becoming more a commonplace today. They may be dating or and marrying more often but cross-aged couples haven't yet gained widespread acceptance in our part of the world.

This story is about someone close to my heart. He has to marry for unexplainable reasons but he is too embarrassed to utter his fiancee's age. He relates that she is much older than him but does not like to take the topic further. Why did he get himself in such a situation is a mystery to me. Wouldn't he have to face more humiliating situations after marriage? Was she afraid that their relationship will fizzle out with time?

His excuse is that she is a 'good' person and that he cannot break their vow but if she is such a 'good' person would she have forced him into making such a promise? Wouldn't she have had more faith in him? A promise is a set of words which you use to chain a another to you but trust and faith are words which bonds beyond time.

They are what I call an 'immortal pact' because they are given whole heartedly.

There is another couple that I know. She is five years his senior. Their life was rosy when they were in their 20s and early 30s but took a bad turn in the late 30s. They lead separate lives now. Another 'age gap couple' had a messy divorce mainly because she was unable to beget children. They were together for six unsatisfactory years before finally calling it quits.

Such stories makes me recall the tragic tale of Paris and Helen. She was dubbed the 'face that launched a thousand ships' because of the war which ranged on between Troy and Greece. At one instance in the story Oenone warns Paris that Helen will never stay faithful to him as she had already abandoned her first husband for him. Her statement become a reality.

They say age is just another number when it comes to matters of the heart but looking back at some of the stories I have heard or read, I wonder...

My grandmother advised me to choose a spouse who is at least a minute elder than myself. She said that the best age gap is between one to three years. That is her opinion.

This is my a personal belief. There is wisdom in some of our elders' ideologies. Personally I do not believe in age gap relationships. No offense. Let yours not be added to the list - just to become a 'immoral yet immortal' love story amid the rest.

Shehara [email protected]