Of guys and girls

Men dream of courtship, but in wedlock wake - Alexander Pope

When men and women get together, there are two worlds his and hers. They have different values, priorities, and habits. They play by different rules. This is why a life of a couple is infested by arguements, break-ups and maybe even divorce.

Men and women are totally different. This refers to all three areas - emotional, mental and physical. Have you ever heard one of your friends complain, "I don't understand men. They are so confusing. I don't know what I do to put them off."?

Likewise I have heard seemingly normal men utter sentences along the lines of, "Women are so hard to understand."

'Understanding' is the key word in a steady relationship. Understanding coupled with trust forms the foundation to a lifetime bond.

Women are more personal than men. They tend to be more preoccupied with building relationships: with fellow human beings and God. They are the ones who come up with suggestions to attend church or visit the temple or kovil.

Women derive their identity through close relationships while men gain the latter through vocation. Women are enthusiastic about developing a meaningful, multi-level relationship.

They wish to be a lover, a best friend, a homemaker and most of all an appreciated partner.

Men are more challenge-and-conquer oriented. They enjoy dominance and competition and are less desirous in building intimate relationships. This is why the behaviours clash and women are at the receiving end in most relationships.

It is such a pity that some girls and guys miss out the 'perfect partner' due to a slight tiff over an issue which is hardly worth mentioning. When you turn back and rewind the episodes you wonder what the outcome would be if the incident had never taken place and some words have never been uttered. You wish with all your heart that you can time travel and prevent the event from ever taking place.

But it is impossible to erase an action which is already committed or pull back words which are already uttered. These incidents are like a foreboding. It helps your partner grade the other's characteristics and decide if they want to spend the rest of their life with you. Very few men realize that their spouse's natural ability for developing relationships can help them fulfill the two greatest commandments taught by Christ: loving God and loving others (Matt 22:36-40). Jesus said that if we obey these two commandments, we are fulfilling all the commandments. Think of it! Women possess the God-given drive and ability to help others build meaningful relationships in both these sectors.

God knew men needed special help because He stated, ("It is not good for man to be alone; I will make him a helper [and completer] suitable for him" (Genesis 2:18)). If you let her, a woman can open up a whole new world of deeper relationships for you.

Shehara

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