Ways to build your self-esteem

Dr. K. Kuhathasan CEO : CENLEAD

Do you at times feel frustrated, inferior lacking in confidence, angry, depressed, jealous, envious, unloved, isolated, lonely in a function, withdrawn, shy, apologetic, impatient, rejected, negative, hopeless, un adventurous, easily upset, self-pitying, self-hating, aimless, unworthy, indecisive, dependent, powerless, fearful of failure, lacking in purpose, stressed or passive? If then, you are suffering from low self-esteem.

Do you expressed yourself “I am not good at anything”, “Others are better than me”, “I don’t have opportunities”, “People don’t like to have dealings with me”, “I look awful “Everyone is looking at me”, “All are passing negative remarks on me” etc. If so, you are also suffering from low self-esteem.

Begin with self-awareness

To overcome low self-esteem, begin a fresh with few simple self-awareness techniques Firstly, stop punishing yourself! Whatever you’re obsessing about, stop it right now, whether it is good look, habits, success or fame.

Re-discover your personality-what gives you joy, makes you sad and motivates you to give your best. You’ll soon come to know that you’re not all that bad. Everyone is endowed with some talent/ aptitude that can be used productively.

You may be suffering from some deep seated insecurity, which cripples you into thinking that everyone around you either hates you or must be talking ill about you, behind your back.

Rather than giving into such feeling, always remember that no one is infallible. Take the first step towards healing. Begin by loving yourself. It simply implies that you need to face your weaknesses, acknowledge and accept them.

This acceptance should spur you on to better action, that to filling in the void meaningfully. Sustain the process and inculcate an attitude of positiveness.
 

Ways to build self-esteem

1. Acknowledge your rights.
2. Look after your needs.
3. Express your feelings and opinions.
4. Build assertiveness into your life.
5. Care for yourself physically and emotionally.
6. Give yourself affirmations.
7. Recollect your past achievements, recognise your qualities, identify your special merits and move forward.
8. Think of success, expect victory, anticipate achievements.
9. Be yourself and live your life as you want to be
10. Be friendly with positive and constructive people who can guide you, direct you and encourage you to feel good. Avoid negative people who always discourages you.
11. Have a mission, vision and goals. Always think of your goals and work towards them.
12. Plan your time - work and leisure - and balance your life between the two.
13. Accept leadership. Enjoy your work. Be ready to accept challenges new responsibilities and new assignments.

Develop self-assertion statements

Self - assertion statements are self-motivational positive statements of desired then outcomes, or behaviours that are written down and then imprinted in the mind by reading, remembering and repeating them over and over again.

Statements like “I am very confident of becoming a manager”, “Management and the people are appreciating my valuable contributions”, “I am always positive, constructive and dynamic”, I have a bright future,” “I will make use of all opportunities”, “I am admired and appreciated by all” etc will accelerate the process of building your self-esteem.

The advantages of practising such self-assertive declarations are:

1. The image of such developments will be recorded in the subconscious mind. As a result of repeated statements over you will develop self confident and self-esteem.
2. You will take control of the process rather than leaving things to chance.
3. Effective programming of the subconscious mind will lead to self-motivation and self-directed action towards self-confidence.

Self-assertion statements for managers are:

1. Work is a fundamental element of my life, an activity essential to all aspects of my life.
2. Improvement in work will improve all other aspects of my life. I will become more self-confident, more assertive and more dynamic.
3. Work is not just a means to an end. My work can and should fulfil and satisfy me at the deepest levels.
4. I possess unique capabilities and talents from which I can create something of lasting value.
5. Every day and in every respect I am emerging as an effective and efficient manager.
6. I have a bright future. I am doing well. I will rise up. I am unique. I will achieve positive results for all my efforts.
7. I am an efficient and effective manager capable to getting things done.
8. I am good at training personnel, delegation responsibilities and enjoy the achievements of my people.
9. I always enjoy the satisfaction that comes from developing my people.
10. I enjoy the results that come from positive thinking.
11. I consistently receive tremendous satisfaction from efficient customer service.

Repeat the above statements as the first activity in the morning for about three months.

Your mind will be filled with confidence and you will emerge with positive energy.