Archives

by F. A. Rodrigo - Sathianathen

The International Year for Elders fell on 1st October. Let us give a little thought, remembering our aged parents and elders who are suffering in silence in our country.

When we are young and healthy, we never for a moment give serious thought that we will one day grow old and feeble and that we would need the assistance of someone to look after us in the autumn of our life.

In Sri Lanka, prior to World War II children were very attached and loved their parents and although they were married and had family responsibilities and settled down in life, they never neglected to look after their parents in their old age, whether they had wealth in abundance or otherwise.

With time, there have been changes in Sri Lanka. Children feel that it is a burden to look after their parents in their old age, when they are sick and feeble, perhaps due to financial strains and with the escalating cost of living. In these circumstances some would prefer that their parents die early.

I know many children who have neglected their parents, do not wish to keep their parents even for a day, although as grandparents they always love to spend their last days with their grandchildren.

A year ago I met an old couple near the Pettah Bus Stand (exposed to the elements) which is now their home, far away from home. They appear to be in their early eighties, partially blind. A very pathetic story was related by the old man. He was an educated person and spoke English very fluently, had lived his life in Kandy, had eight children and had sufficient wealth, which he divided amongst the eight children equally. He gave them in marriage expecting they would look after them in their old age. As time went on the children had taken up the position among themselves as to why the other brother or sister could not take the responsibility of looking after the parents in their old age. Everyone evaded the real issue of taking responsibility of looking after their parents and nothing was done to make the parents happy.

One day, a son who could not bear the parents been neglected and suffering any further decided to bring the parents to Colombo from Kandy with the idea of admitting them to an Elder's Home in the City. Having failed in his mission, he just left the parents at the Pettah Bus Stand and disappeared. Never was the son seen again. What this son did is really shocking. The aged couple had to beg for their livelihood.

In another case concerning the parents of a boy and girl who were given in marriage, the parents had to look after their grandchildren when they become old and feeble. The two children refused to keep their parents and started to ill treat them. The children, affluent and educated in leading schools in Colombo, tried to get them into an Elders' Home but failed. Meanwhile the mother died. It was a great relief to them. The father lived with the daughter. But after a week's stay she put the old man into a three wheeler (paid) and sent him to the brother's place. Again after a week or so the son sends him in a three wheeler (paid) to his sister's place.

The old man was suffering, since he could not bear this any more, he went to a relative's place with his problems. They refused to keep him or admit him to an elder's Home, because the children could well afford to admit him to a paying Elder's Home. These are a few isolated cases but many old people are suffering in silence today.

Is this not a cruel world that we are living in today to desert our parents at a time they really need the children's assistance?

In developed countries children leave their parents at an early age of 16 years and live by themselves. When it comes to old age the State looks after them and provides them with social security and free public transport passes etc.

Several religious organisations in our country with limited financial resources and on donations have provided for the old and feeble but this is far and few compared to the needs of the neglected elder's in our country.

I was very pleased to hear recently that the Old Girls' Association of Good Shepherd Convent, Kotahena, have opened an Elder's Home at Mabole, Wattala, for the old girls of Good Shepherd Convent, who have become destitute. This is a worthy project. Perhaps other schools and colleges should start similar projects helping the aged past pupils who are sick and feeble to look after them in the autumn of their life, when you can gain merit.

Our politicians have debated many matters in Parliament but never for a moment have given serious thought to the matter of opening more Elder's Homes throughout the country. Perhaps when the time comes they can count on their pensions after five years in Parliament and fall back on their financial resources.

But what about the thousands of helpless old people who continue to suffer in silence. Politicians should give serious thought to the elderly people who have now become deadwood and whom society has also neglected.

In the meanwhile, senior citizens' clubs should be organized in the 249 AGA divisions in the country. The old and the neglected people living in loneliness should be brought together and their welfare looked into and suitable homes found. The Senior Citizens of the country may spend their latter years of life in an atmosphere of self-respect, comfort and peace of mind.

The Government may not have the money to finance the building of Homes for Elders in the country, who have been discarded by their loved ones in the autumn of their lives. But, perhaps, the Department of Social Services should undertake to launch a fortnightly lottery to find the money to up keep these Homes for the Elders. People will, no doubt, support a worthy cause since they may also one day seek entrance to these Homes for the Elders.

Early in 1997, the Department of Social Services organized the issue of Elder's Identity Cards, through the Grama Sevaka Niladari of the Divisional Secretariat, to senior citizens over 70 years of age. Many elderly people are still not aware of this facility which will enable them to get priority services in hospitals for treatment, travelling in buses, police and legal assistance, pension services and preference not to queue for their needs.

It is very surprising that the Department of Social Services has failed to give their much needed publicity in the print and electronic TV media for the general public to give due recognition to those who hold Elders Identity Cards.

We have had many sponsors for sports, Beauty Queen contests, etc., Perhaps some leading banks and multi-national companies can come forward and help people over 70 years giving much needed publicity in the electronic and print media.

Let us leave the world better than it was found and let our parents feel that they have not been neglected by their loved ones in the loneliness and also by the society to which they once contributed their mite.

News | Business | Features | Editorial | Security
Politics | World | Letters | Sports | Obituaries |

Produced by Lake House
Copyright 2001 The Associated Newspapers of Ceylon Ltd.
Comments and suggestions to :Web Manager