Fox and the bunch of grapes

MODERN FABLE: Fox will be a fox always. Old or young a fox will outfox anyone. That is the image that all foxes in the world posses.

But when a fox is outfoxed and looked upon us a stupid fool it will be a telling blow to all the foxes.

This was the reason why Mr. Fox was in a real nasty mood. One of his ancestors had tarnished the cunning and brainy image that they always bragged about.

Mr. Fox was angry and thinking to himself... "Why did that stupid old fool try to reach that bunch of grapes? If it was out of his reach, then he shouldn't have tried to grab it. If he was a real fox similar to politicians, he would have used someone else to do his dirty work.

But this so-called "smart" fox insulted us by failing to pluck the grapes and add to that condemning it by calling them sour. He should also know that foxes don't eat grapes!

Mr. Fox was really in a sour mood for the whole episode was a sickening story.

Anyway he was determined to change that black mark that was troubling generations and generations of foxes.

To make it right and bring back the cunning image which had been the hallmark of foxes Mr. Fox had to find a bunch of grapes somehow or other.

But at present grapes are being imported and freely available in the market.

What he was wanted a bunch of grapes hanging on a creeper. Although that kind of grapes were very rare to find these days, Mr. Fox was determined to change the whole episode. He went in search of locally grown grapes.

Although he knew that local grapes were very sour when compared to the imported ones he had to find it and pluck it to bring back their image.

At last after an intensive search he found what he sought in a home garden. But the hurdle he had to face was not the height that his ancestor encountered but a fierce dog who came to the gate with a deep growl.

"Yes, Mr. Fox, can I help you?"

"Yes, Mr. Dog. You are my only saviour. I have taken a bet with another fox over that bunch of grapes." The fox pointed at the grapes and added, "But he says that a good-for-nothing dog is keeping watch and challenged to outsmart you and taste the grapes. But I told my friend that you were a decent canine with a good breeding and will definitely oblige me by getting me the grapes."

Mr. Fox was like a politician who was trying to coax an angry voter.

But the dog was smarter and he knew about the old story where a fox was outfoxed by a bunch of grapes. But although the dog was pleased with what the fox told about him, he was unable to help him as his boss would skin him alive if he gave away the grapes.

Mr. Fox, these grapes look good but actually they are not meant to be eaten. They are meant to be like ornaments.

I suggest you change your mind and buy some tasty imported grapes from a supermarket and tell your friend that good-for-nothing dog gave it to you."

Mr. Fox knew he was at a dead end. He again glanced at the glistening bunch of grapes and said, "Yes, my friend. They look sour," and turned away.

"Yes, my ancestor was right. He did the correct thing by saying the grapes were sour".

Moral: When eating grapes always go for imported stuff.

- ROHANA

Abhishek can wait, Ash to marry tree first

MARRIAGE: Those keenly anticipating the wedding of Bollywood heartthrobs Aishwarya Rai and Abhishek Bachchan hold on for a while. If reports were to be believed, then Aishwarya is right now getting ready to marry a 'tree'. This, of course, would just be a ceremonial one - leading up to her wedding with Abhishek.

A day after the Bachchan family and Aishwarya left for Mumbai after performing pujas at Vishwanath Temple and Sankat Mochan Temple on Monday, the temple town is abuzz with talks of the ceremonial 'Kumbh Vivah'.

A renowned Vedic Brahmin requesting anonymity said: 'Aishwarya will have to marry either a peepal or banana tree or with an idol of Lord Vishnu (of gold or silver), in case she is manglik. 'Kumbh Vivah' is performed for manglik girls to ward off ill effects.

Since there are reports that Aishwarya is manglik, priests will certainly advise performing of 'Kumbh Vivah' before the actual marriage,' said Sridhar Pandey, a priest who took part in the puja for the Bachchan family and Aishwarya at the Sankat Mochan Temple.

Astrologer Chandrasghekar Swami of Bangalore said, 'Abhishekh and Aishwarya were in the holy town (Varanasi) at my suggestion. I had advised both the families to perform this corrective puja at an ancient Shiva temple.'

Swami is the first astrologer to say that Aishwarya is manglik. Ajitabh Bachchan, brother of Amitabh had air-dashed to Bangalore early this year to meet Swami at the behest of Aishwarya's father Krishnaraja Rai with the horoscopes of the two actors. Ajitabh also accompanied the Bachchan family and Aishwarya to Vishwanath Temple.

With the trip to the holy town, the Bachchans have sent out a message across that Aishwarya was now part of their family.

Courtesy - Hindustan Times

Easy way out

FAINTING: Local television the other day carried footage of former Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berluscon fainting while addressing a gathering of voters. The man was in full flight when he suddenly collapsed and had to be carried away from the stage by partymen.

The reason for the blackout was not given. But to viewers of the episode this was no sham. The aged politico was certainly under the weather if not under the spell of his cheering audience.

The Sri Lankan public too was witness to a fainting bout by a one time police chief during a ceremony accorded to the Britain's heir to the throne not many moons ago. They watched astounded how this sturdy individual collapsed on stage as if pole axed.

We don't know if the Royal presence had overwhelmed the IGP to such a degree he lost his bearings. But a right royal mess this created with the impression being created that Britain still ruled the waves in its one time colony to the extent that its minions still fall before their presence.

Victim

Of course, there was another fainting fit, the victim this time being a politician but with the incident taking place outside public glare and there was no drama created.

This was when the then only member of now king makers in Parliament decided to defy an order from his leader that he tender an apology to the Government, on pain of disciplinary action and possible ouster.

The man of course would have nothing of the kind and devised an ingenious ploy to circumvent the issue.

This he did by collapsing in a heap in the midst of his speech, thereby bypassing the stricture of his leader through the medium of the faint which later proved to be feigned.

This was towards the end of the life of that Parliament and the man eventually survived. No politician ever since has displayed such enterprise. Now with the Italian example they could get inspired.

Come election time a particular MP on a sticky wicket vis a vis his voters could now suddenly feign a faint on stage to attract sympathy.

One may conjure up a politco holding forth about his contribution to his constituents and suddenly grasp at air in agony. He would of course have to be convincing. But having contrived to convince his electors earlier, this would not pose a big deal to him.

Ample torso

If anything he would need is to whittle down on his ample torso to at least reach pre-election proportions. For no voter in their right minds could be swayed to believe that a politico brimming with health sporting ample proportions could collapse unless on their own accord.

For it is the public who is made to faint while grappling with soaring prices all the time. The politicos would now have to change tack and strive to slim down to a decent level if not to the level of their hapless voters.

Political meetings could get interesting with doctors drafted onto platforms to be at hand to nurse a particularly eager to please servant of the people who is battling to get re-elected. The novelty of the Italian experience could provide a new opening for our people's representatives and aspirants to political office.

They would now fall before the people to demonstrate that they are always the servants of the voters even though this fall could be contrived. Well garlanded politicos parading the streets with their supporters could suddenly develop a faint and be rushed in a humble bullock cart to the nearest vedamahattaya.

Poll vaulters to the opposition camp can always faint at disciplinary hearings and prolong their stay on the other side.

The practice could also enter the august House of Parliament with Ministers with no answers during question time in the House collapsing on their feet.

- RAMBLER