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| Tuesday, 24 December 2002 |
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Love potions! Somebody somewhere feels I need a well deserved break with womankind and an ad has begun appearing with the rest of my e mail everyday: 'Science has finally done it,' says the ad. 'Human Sex Pheromones. Scientifically designed, tested and proven to Attract Women Like Magic!. Now you can be more popular with women than you ever thought possible. Just one bottle of this amazing product will change your life for ever!!' The ad doesn't say whether I have to drink the stuff or slap a dash of it on my collar, lips, eyes or wherever, nor do I intend finding out. I'm not sure whether my wife would approve of women following me all the time like some Pied Piper from Hamelyn Town! It was a little later in the day that I saw a news item in the morning paper . The local zoo had decided to unshackle the elephants and let them loose. Well, and this is what happened to the tuskers: Thirty nine year old Laxmi got into a heated tiff with fourteen year old Rajkumar who ended up with abrasions all over his trunk. Poor Rajkumar, according to the report it's he who has to face the biggest adjustment to this newly found freedom as it's difficult to keep the females off him..! 'Playing with Rajkumar excites the females,' says the zoo superintendent, 'but because he is short, it creates a mismatch in height and the females get infuriated and finally attack him in frustration.' I wonder what Rajkumar the male elephant's thoughts were before the chains were removed, when he was shackled far away from the attractive females of his species. He must have lusted and longed for the day when he would have all of them fawning all over him. He got his wish and found that he fell short of pleasing them..! What if I finally decided to have a go at the magic potion. Glug, glug, gug and hey presto the bottle is finished. I stand and wait and before I can say Jane Fonda, I find myself being surrounded by the most beautiful two legged creatures of the opposite sex. "Oh Bob," they say, "you are so sexy, so divine, ooh la, la..!" I watch them all around me and I ogle and stare and look and slowly the wonderful women start getting irritated. "Say something," they say. "Do something," the others say. But Bob, the shy Bob, the dim witted Bob, doesn't know what to do or say. His outside, which attracted the lovelies is sexy with the magic potion, but his inside hasn't changed. And believe you me, it will take more than a bottle of magic to change your inner you. Character which is the inner you, needs investment, more than just a bottle of magic wizardry, more than just a new suit or a flashy wardrobe. More than a wallet full of cash or a string of credit cards..! We all dream and fantasise about the day when we'll have the whole world running after us. But what happens when they catch up with you and you watch with shock as they start giggling, then laughing and finally shaking their heads with disappointment to find that there is not much behind your sexy looks, the jazzy clothes and your snazzy car. Instead... Watch interest grow when you invest in character..! |
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